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Politics In Action

I’d rather not write a post about Kolby Granville, but he’s a public figure and his Facebook posts make it tough to stay quiet.

Kolby seemed nice in law school. I think he was in the peace corps and a famous archer before that. I heard he ran for office before law school too. He asked lots of questions in class. He got some type of firm job after graduating, and he quit to become a teacher, at some point running for and winning a spot on Tempe’s City Council. Like hundreds of other people I don’t really know terribly well along with a small group of people I do, he and I are Facebook buddies.

He recently posted this:

I felt my comment was fitting:

Why didn’t they invite Sheriff Joe and his tank too? Or a platoon of cops in riot gear with shields and tear gas? Enough of a show of force and they could stomp out crime altogether…

It even got a “like.” I hear those things are as good as gold. Plus, he previously put up a post where he complained about Sheriff Joe bringing his tank to a parade.

Kolby still has yet to respond to my comment.

What I’ve figured out so far is that vans and tables and pick-up spots for the loved ones of large volumes of legally and often factually innocent soon-to-be DUI defendants who will be arrested and have their blood or breath taken from their body with the use or threat force is worthy of a post from him admonishing Facebook “friends” not to drink and drive. Seeing a tank once used by “America’s Toughest Sheriff” to kill lots of chickens while busting up illicit cock-fighting operations with the help Steven Seagal is somehow one step too far. Lots of violence and the needless destruction of lives in a popular campaign is a deterrent. An incompetent overreaction that we can all shake our head about is terrible.


Perhaps another post will put it into perspective:

The response to what the person asked:

STAFF RESPONSE…..First off, I’m going to apologize for the long email, you raised a number of issues. Call or email me for any clarification needed.

1. Yes, you live in the Dava Lakeshore NA. they have been largely inactive outside of hosting a Getting Arizona Involved in Neighborhoods (GAIN) night every October. The xxxxxx at xxxxxxxx@hotmail.com are the current contacts. If you’re interested in doing more as an association, let me know.

2. Currently, the Neighborhood Grant Program, www.tempe.gov/neighborhoodgrants serves as the only funding source for any type of neighborhood traffic calming, including speed humps. If you’re interested in pursuing a grant, there’s still time and I can assist you with the application process, including getting input from your neighbors.

Using the grants as a funding source does not allow you to skip the other steps in the speed hump process. You would still need to obtain signatures. Steve is the correct contact for speed humps, have you already gotten the map showing signatures required?

3. I’m not sure who in the Police Department you contacted, but there is a specific unit, the Selective Enforcement Motorcycle Squad (SEMS) http://www.tempe.gov/index.aspx?page=2442 that enforces traffic in neighborhoods at the request of residents. You can fill out an online form on the website to request motor officers.

4. In the meantime, if you’re interested, our office can send out a postcard similar to the attached to the area. Other neighborhoods have found the reminder to be helpful.

Ah yes, the “Selective Enforcement Motorcycle Squad.” I wonder if that’s the group of cops that needlessly target and unfairly cite the motorcycle riders who frequently call my office. Those cops also have partner-in-crime prosecutors who selectively offer ridiculously harsh plea bargains to bikers because they think we’re all criminals. I suppose they’re fixing bad traffic by profiling and taking pesky innocent motorcycle riders off the road, but I can’t imagine that’s the point.

Maybe it’s the group of motorcycle cops that seems to always stop, arrest, and ultimately cite my non-white clients. That’s surely “selective enforcement,” and I imagine it really clears out traffic in light of the fact that only slightly over half of the state seems to be white non-Hispanic, but that somehow doesn’t quite strike me as what he was endorsing.

All I know is that he surely can’t mean that an officer would just sit around in a neighborhood and fairly enforce minor civil traffic laws. Any half-attentive moron who has ever driven a car knows that the moment you have a cop around, it’s nothing but dangerous random braking and polluting gridlock in each approaching direction and a NASCAR Rolling Start of carnage the moment people see the cop is occupied and flee the scene with wide open throttle.

He also must be kidding about the speed hump thing. My speed-humped street is an amazing experiment in social engineering where old white assholes who love to vote get speed humps in front of their house because fast horseless carriages upset their geraniums while nice non-white families with lots of kids riding bikes on different streets watch irritated drivers go twice as fast thanks to the aforementioned assholes and their speed humps.

Honestly, I have no clue how the hell his “STAFF RESPONSE” (QUIT YELLING!) fixes anything.

There’s another post too:

And I thought he was a feel-good liberal type? Luckily, it puts the selective enforcement thing into perspective.

He likes bicycles. He likes voters. If he hates people who hurt cyclists, cyclists will love him. On top of that, the most dedicated voters are the ones who are scared of stuff and need help because they’re sad little baby birds whose elected mothers have to vomit all of their basic needs and ineffective antidotes to the things that scare them into their mouths. If he hates the people who scare stupid voters, stupid voters will love him. Reelection!

Clicking through to the article, it seems the driver insisted “he heard a thump on his car and saw the cyclists on the ground in his rearview mirror, but didn’t think they were seriously hurt so he didn’t stop.” If he was charged with three felonies, one of which appears to be a prison-mandatory dangerous felony count, there had to have been something horribly wrong with the state’s case if he’s only doing seven days in jail and a couple years of probation.

Maybe the case is even weaker than the articles suggest. Like maybe there was no evidence he hit them on “PURPOSE” (QUIT YELLING!) or something like that?

This is the problem with every politician, even seemingly good ones like Kolby. I can’t say there has ever been or ever will be a better candidate for his city council spot. I can’t say that most people wouldn’t do the same thing if they prioritized their lives and figured out where they’d have to sell out if they felt their calling was to run for office and have most people to be okay with them so they could focus on the pet projects they felt were necessary to make their communities better places.

Regardless, someone has to pay the price of success; the DUI defendants who weren’t impaired but got caught in a dragnet holiday DUI fundraiser and reelection rally, the minorities and bikers and endangered people everywhere who are innocent victims of a police state, and the people who may have made mistakes but become poster-monsters nonetheless for things the bloodthirsty crowd only suspects they did.

I must not have the stomach for politics. Who am I to look at various disgusting displays of violence and decide which one gets my influential Facebook approval and which one ruins a holiday parade?

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2 Responses to "Politics In Action"

  1. Mike says:

    I was thinking about hiring Brown and Little until I read this. “Old white assholes” doesn’t exactly make me feel welcome as a white male in his 40s. Compressing ageism and racism in the same sentence might be a trait that impresses some people. I’m just not one of them. On the bright side, I’m sure the next lawyer I consider hiring likely won’t charge a $100 consultation fee.

    1. Matt Brown says:

      Would you be offended if I wrote a post deriding middle-aged white serial killers? Or murderous, young, Hispanic sicarios? Or power-hungry, really old, evil people of all races?

      My problem is selfish assholes, and the group I referred to happened to be old and white.

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